Adios Mexico

Well, peeps, my time here is rapidly coming to a close.  I decided to favor you all with a semi-deep post about my thoughts and feelings on this whole experience.

On Friday we teachers had our final party.  Our party to say goodbye to this Mexican life we have lived for the past four months.  I can't believe it's nearly over.  You have no idea how fast that went.  Anyway, at said party we played a game in which we answered some questions and then read the answers and tried to guess who answered the question with those words, ya get?  So how about in this post, I just answer those questions for all of you, in a more detailed and semi-thoughtful way, por supuesto.  Deal.

Question numero uno:  What will be your first meal back in the U.S.?

Answer:  While true, this was not actually number one, it was number five, I just want to answer it first, so here goes.  I think I want yogurt and granola about the second I land.  That is my favorite food on the planet.  In real life, I eat it at least once, sometimes twice, and occasionally three times a day.  Because, hello, it's freaking delicious, that's why.  And I have been deprived of this Heavenly dish for four months now.  I think it's time we be reintroduced.

But as far as actual meals go, I don't know.  I just want every breakfast food I can think of.  Pancakes, waffles, one-eyed-wallies, german pancakes, french toast.  Mmm.  Oh and peanut butter.  Another food I dearly miss.  And normal chips without chili.  And homemade pizza.  And strawberries.

Yep, those are the foods I will eat when I get home.

Question numero dos:  What made you most nervous about coming to Mexico?

Answer:  Illness, for sure.  I have a deathly fear of vomit in all its shapes, sizes, smells, colors, and glory.  I hate it.  "Never again," my 11 year old self promised me last time I threw up.  And guess what.  I have kept that promise.  But then I decided to move to Mexico (who does that?) and they told us at training, "Just plan on getting sick.  It happens to everyone."  I was like, "Great, my life is over, I'm not going, I refuse to barf."  And then I found myself in Mexico.  Remember that story?  How I went into the bathroom in the airport and the girl in the stall next to me was letting all her insides out?  So then I was like, "Great, they were right, I'm going to get sick."  And within two weeks of being here, half of our group had had their fair share.  A month ago the 11th of us 12 experienced Mexican vomit.  But guess what.  Here I am, ten days away from my house in Utah, and I have yet to share the love.

Now, don't get me wrong, I have experienced the Mexican stomach many a time these past few months.  But I have not let it come back up, and that is quite the feat.  If I do make it all the way home, you all owe me a million dollars because I. am. awesome.  The end of that.

Question numero tres:  What surprised you the most?

Answer:  Well, okay, listen to this.  I always kind of thought that in order to really grow and progress in life, you needed trials and hardship and blah, blah, you know?  And yes, I still think those things are very important and we do need them, but at the same time, I now see that you can grow a lot and learn a lot, even in the good times.  Because for me, Mexico has been a good time.  I might even venture to say the best time of my life, and I'm not exaggerating.  I feel no stress and I love everything I am doing.  But in all this non-stress I am feeling, I feel like I have grown and learned more than I ever have, you know? This is really hard for me to explain, especially via blog.

What I am trying to say is that I am surprised by how much I loved everything about this experience, how much I grew, how much I learned, and how much it changed my life.  I will never be the same ever again.

Question numero cuatro:  What is something you have learned?

Answer:  Okay, as mentioned above, I have learned so much it's really quite ridiculous to even ask, but since you did, here goes.  I will tell you two things I have learned.  One is that attitude is everything.  Everything.  Before I left for Mexico, I told myself I was going to love it.  I told myself that I was going to have to let go of a lot of things in order to enjoy myself.  I told myself I was going to be a successful teacher and I was going to leave feeling like this was all worth it.

Then I got here.  And there were definitely things I had to let go.  Remember the food?  On a daily basis I had to make myself forget how the food was prepared, where it came from, so on and so forth.  Remember the kids?  Everyday I wake up and say to myself, "Oh my gosh!  I am living in Mexico right now, teaching English to little Mexican kids!  This is the coolest thing ever!"  And when something happens that I don't like (like toilets with no seat), I just say to myself, "This is so Mexico!  I can't believe I actually get to live this life!"  And then I smile about it.  And then it's all good.  It doesn't take too long before everything you tell yourself is true.  I love teaching for real.  The food is delicious.  And the gross things?  I've seen worse.

The other thing I have learned here in Mexico is that I am an adult.  This is actually very significant.  I was not an adult when I got on the plane to come here, and I knew it.  I was close, but not quite.  However, a few weeks, maybe a month in to all this, and I could feel the difference.  I just knew that I was an adult.  And now I'm excited.  I can't wait to come home and see my Utah life from my adult perspective for the first time.  When I go home to see my fam, I won't be the child Brittan coming back like I was all last year.  I will be the adult Brittan, coming to visit like an adult child would.  I don't really know what it was that changed, but something did for sure, and the adult me has stepped out.  This is good news for all.   Prepare yourself.

Question numero cinco:  What will you miss the most when you leave?

Answer:  Oohhhh boy.  My family is definitely number one on the list of things to miss (yes I have a list, yes mangos, huevitos, and constant Spanish are on that list, and yes I will be returning to good old Tehuacan in the near future, for sure).  My family is the bomb.  They are so fun and so nice and generous and happy and just pure great to be around.  They are so relaxed about me doing my thing and I feel like everything is just so take-it-easy around here.  I have had some good laughs around these people.  They have taught me so much and given me so much, I could never repay them in any form.  I love that I just live here like another member of the fam.  I wake up when I feel like it and come downstairs when I feel like it and just chill on the couch when I want, or eat an apple if I so desire.  I put the silverware away every morning after I eat breakfast.  I just have a place in the fam, you know?  Me being there is never awkward, because I just belong.  I have a room.  I have a place at the table.  I love it because I really feel like I'm home.  I'm not a stranger or a temporary visitor; I am home.  That is what I will miss the most.

I will also miss my students.  They are so cute and so funny and I love going to class everyday to speak English with them.  We have had some great times together and I will miss seeing them everyday.  I hope their next teacher is good to them because they are awesome and they deserve the best.

And clearly I will miss the teachers.  As I have told you before, we have the best ILP group on the face of the planet.  No group before us has ever matched our awesomeness nor will any group after us.  That's just a fact of life.  All the teachers are so nice and genuine and fun to be around.  I feel comfortable around them and I love spending time with them.  It is so great that we all chose to come here at the same time to do the same thing, so that if nothing else, we made 11 new great friends that we can chill with when we get home.  And that's the great thing about it.  We can still be friends in the U.S. Our one month reunion is already planned and I am stoked.  Dirty Dash?  Meet Nacho and the Nuns.  Cannot wait, I tell you.

Thus, we've reached the end of the questionare.  Sorry my answers weren't crystal clear and magnificently worded.  It'll be easier to tell you all in person my feelings, but I just wanted to give you a sneak peak.

And just for fun, how about I give you a list of things I am most looking forward to when I return home NEXT WEEK!!!!!!

1.  Meckenzie.  You get to be number one here because you are that awesome.  You are so hilarious and I can't wait to talk to you in person.  Let's be best sisters for life AND beyond, deal?  Deal.
2.  The rest of the fam, clearly.  I just don't want to name everyone because that would take forever, okay?  No offense.
3.  Carpet.  I guarentee I will lay down on the carpet for at least 30 seconds the second I walk in the door.
4.  Blasting music in the car and singing my lungs out all the way home.
5.  Watching all the movies I want in ENGLISH.
6.  Cold milk.
7.  My black sandals.
8.  Free, semi-clean, and toilet paper-supplied public bathrooms.  Toilet seat included.
9.  Being barefoot in the front yard.
10.  CHURCH!  Oh how I've missed thee.  (Don't worry, I've been going to church here).
11.  My car.
12.  My phone.
13.  My piano.
14.  PB&J sandwiches on wheat.  Maybe that will be my first meal.
15.  Washing machine.  And dryer of course.
16.  Straight hair.
17.  Comfy bed.
18.  Snow cones.
19.  Running.
20.  Jewelry.

Okay, I think I will stop now.  FYI that list took me like two seconds to write.  I'm excited.  See you all in 10 days!

Peace out.